Discover what making love has to do with personal
See 5 things that make this particular activity so
important to us
Learn how to
lose your inhibitions
Find out how to distinguish between different kinds of
Subjects range from
first time love making
... to beginners tantra to advanced tantra techniques
Improve your love making and simultaneously get more
Read about techniques, positions, humor & sex,
funny sex quotes plus case
So Important and Yet So Repressed
Making love or having sex is how we keep the human race going (at
least until we start cloning and procreating in other, more
scientific (and boring) ways. It's also how we seal the bond between
us when we are love partners. And it's one of the basic human needs.
And it's a very important way to have fun. And it's a powerful tool
in personal development. And, and, and ...
Suffice it to say that this wonderful activity has many, many
applications - and implications.
For centuries, perhaps even millennia people in power have sought to
control human sexuality - which is logical given how much energy and
drive is inherent in our sexuality. Unhealthy repression, lots of
problems and unnecessary inhibitions are the result. Things we now
have to deal with.
Some People May Want to Stop Reading Now
This site has its focus on helping you learn new things, solve your
problems and achieve your goals, and that is true for the subject of
making love / sex, too. Personally I don't really have a lot of
inhibitions in that area, so I'll just say it like I see it.
So, if you have inhibitions regarding reading about sex and you want
to keep them, this page is probably not for you - in that case you
might do yourself a favour and stop reading now. Consider yourself
What Is Making Love?
Is there a difference between sex and making love? The way I see it,
yes. Making love often includes sex, whereas sex doesn't necessarily
include making love. According to the dictionary sex is a physical activity, i.e. sexual
intercourse or some other physical activity directly aimed at
satisfying the sexual need. This is a useful definition.
Making love, on the other hand, is much more than that.For a brief discussion of the difference between the two, with
practical examples, please read the page Sex
What Makes Love Making and Sex so Important?
Well, here are five good reasons:
love and sex is both pleasurable, fun and personally developing.
When two people share a positive, entertaining and giving experience
like that, it creates a bond between them.
sexual drive is actually connected to the most powerful of the seven
basic human needs [LINK]: the need for survival. The continuation of
our species depends on it.
love is an expression of love, and sex can be the same way.
Generally speaking this appears to be more true for men and women in
whom the feminine energy is dominant. But it is, of course, true for
everybody. And when it comes right down to it, very few things in
life are more important than love.
) can lead to pregnancy and thus can
lead not only a profound change in a person's life but also to 15-20
years of actual responsibility and a lifetime of perceived
responsibility. (An article about parent's responsibility for their
children is upcoming [LINK]).
) creates a strong link or connection
between two people. This link is much more powerful than the link
created by words, kisses, hugs or even sexual petting. We cannot
really explain the nature of this link, but we all clearly sense it.
That's just 5 reasons why making love and sex is so important to us,
and there are surely many more.
Those many reasons are why almost EVERYBODY will attempt to control
or regulate your love life and your sex life: The state, culture and
norms, organized religion, your parents, the rest of your family,
your friends, and particularly your love partner (see also jealousy
All that, however, doesn't change the fact that your love life is
YOURS and YOU are the one in charge of it!
Personal Development through Love Making
Making love and sex actually has a lot to do with personal
In fact, there is a teaching which goes back thousands of years that
emphasizes love making and sex as one of the primary methods for
personal and spiritual development - it's called tantra.
Just to let you know where I myself stand, I haven't trained in
tantra; in fact I only recently learned that my own path of
development actually reflects certain versions of tantra. And that
what I have been doing and the incredible experiences I have been
having in my own sex life are actually described in tantric
teachings. Imagine my surprise and delight!
Anyway. I really don't care what you call it, as long as it works.
And I tell you: Using love making as a basis for personal and
spiritual development works!
Your Two 'Lives' Reflect Each Other
The way I see it, our sex life is pretty much a replica of the rest
of our life - and vice versa: the way we live our life is closely
reflected in our sex life.
Do you live a very conventional life, closely following the social
norms? Maybe even a life that some people might describe as slightly
boring? Then your sex life is likely to be like that, too.
Are you curious, adventurous and uninhibited in your love making?
Then you probably behave more or less the same way in the rest of
your life, too.
The point is this: Your 'big' life can teach you many things about
your sex life - and your sex life can teach you many things about
your 'big' life.
The principles that work really well in love making, work equally
well in the rest of your life.
And the principles the work well in your life - say, the
work equally well when applied to love making and sex.
Ah, the first time! So much expectation is put into it, and
unfortunately, so little pleasure is had. Most people actually have
a very disappointing experience of their first sexual intercourse
(coitus). It's stressful, scary, awkward and sometimes even messy.
So, then, here's some advice about how to make the experience of
first time love making better for yourself and your partner: Just
visit the page First
Love Making Techniques
Technique isn't quite as important you may think, but in order for
you and your love partner to have a satisfying sexual love life you
both need to acquire a certain level of skill. The very best way to
get that is by trial and error. Please note those two words, because
they're BOTH important: TRIAL and ERROR. You need them both!
In other words: You need to try your hand at love making and sex,
you need to play with it and have lots of fun. Apart from having a
partner to do this with the primary requirements are actually
openness, acceptance and a playful attitude. If you like, you can
read more about all this on the page Love Making Techniques [LINK].
it's possible. And what's more: It's fun! This is advanced
lovemaking, though, more advanced than, say, beginners tantra. I
wrote about it in my blog,Soren's
Blog: Inspirational Thoughts
someone I didn't know surprised me with a question about it.
If you are into really deep sexuality, please enjoy the love making
to Give a Female an Orgasm - Without Even Touching (Advanced Male
and Female Orgasm Tips)
Different Lovemaking Positions
This, of course is a part of love making techniques, but it's even
less important! Basically, if you can think about some interesting
love making positions and your partner consents to them, do try them
out. The thing is, though, that it's not the position, nor even the
physical activity that's most important, it's something else
entirely. If you're interested, you can read more about this on the
page Different Love Making Positions [LINK].
This is a sexual empowerment article on eating a girl out tips
a.k.a. how to perform cunnilingus! It is sober & powerful self
improvement information on how to lick pussy. Get general
cunnilingus advice, plus 10 great eating
a girl out tips.
Humor and Sex
Oh, yeah, THIS is important! You REALLY need your sense of humor in
your sex life. I'm not kidding. :-)
The thing is, if you aren't able to have fun and laugh when you make
love and have sex, you're in for a hard time. Seriously, folks,
those bodies of ours and all that they can do, they're great, but
they're also hilarious!
Not taking yourself and your body too seriously is an essential part
of love making and a good sex life. Whether you agree with this or
not, you may want to read this page about Humour and Sex [LINK].
As I have written elsewhere on this website I really like quotes,
and have been gathering good quotes, sayings and more for more than
a decade. Some of those good quotes concern making love, of course,
or more precisely: they concern sex. Over time I'll present those
sex quotes here.
For now, lets just begin with Funny
. Have fun! :-)
Inhibitions are a pain. Not just sexual inhibitions, but all kinds -
and that's what I have written an in-depth self help article about.
The article is general in nature, i.e. not specifically focused on
sexual inhibitions, but it lays the groundwork very nicely. You can
read it atLose
Your Inhibitions - The Why and How of No Inhibitions.
Uninhibited Sex - the Joy of Being Sexually Uninhibited
If there is some non-permanently-damaging sexual activity between
you and a consenting adult that you find repulsive or for some other
reason don't want anything to do with, then you've probably got some
sort of sexual inhibition.
This is extremely common. Almost everybody has, or has had, sexual
inhibitions. The problem with that is that it doesn't feel nice. It
feels limiting and unnatural.
And the truth is that that kind of inhibitions are useless - you
don't need them. Let me just repeat that: In your lovemaking with
another consenting adult (or yourself) you do not need as much as
one single sexual inhibition!
Having very few or no sexual inhibitions (other than not doing
permanent damage), on the other hand, feels natural and wonderful.
Well, you can get there, if you want. Read more, if you so desire,
on the page Lose Your Inhibitions [LINK].
A rising number of women are considering vaginal plastic surgery.
Vaginaplasty and labioplasty are the fastest growing type of
cosmetic surgery in the US and several European countries. The goal
of this female genital cosmetic surgery? To get 'the perfect
vagina'! But is there any such thing? And are there other things you
should take into consideration before you (or somebody you know) get
labial surgery? Here are a whole bunch of self improvement tips on
'designer vaginas'. You'll find them atVaginal
Plastic Surgery to Get the Perfect Vagina - or Not?.
Making Love to a Virgin
Pete and Georgia are two people who have experience with virgins.
Pete has his experience because during a period of his life he was
fascinated with virgins and 'deflowered' several girls. Georgia has
her sexual experience with virgins, not because virginity turns her
on as such, but because young men turn her on. Read what they have
to say on the page Making Love to a Virgin [LINK].
Better Love Making
Here's a fact that surprises many people: The most important part of
your love making is the part that's happening inside yourself.
That's because lovemaking is an experience, and you your experience
of making love takes place inside yourself. Even if you are doing it
with another person.
In other words: A relaxed, open, trusting, loving and playful
attitude can replace sexual skills, but sexual skills cannot replace
relaxed, open, trusting, loving and playful attitude!
If you would like to learn more about this, you can visit the page
Better Love Making [LINK].
Romantic Love Making
Love making. Consider the words. They actually mean 'the creation of
love'. And that what makes love making romantic: When it's an
expression of love [LINK].
If you want to know about romantic love making, then that's your
answer in a nutshell: To make romance, to REALLY make romance, you
need to love the other person. As unconditionally as you can. If you
do, everything suddenly becomes very easy. You just act out of love,
and whatever you do feels great for both you and your partner.
Of course, to many people lovemaking is 'just sex'. Okay, then, what
makes sex romantic?
Some of the most basic answers to that are: 'attention' [LINK],
'acceptance' [LINK], 'be yourself' [LINK] and 'spend lots of time'.
You can read more about all this on: Romantic Love Making [LINK].
As long as it's a normal, healthy pregnancy there is absolutely no
reason why you should not enjoy sex just as much as you've always
Of course, as the woman's stomach grows, some lovemaking positions
become difficult and impractical while other positions become
preferable. Also, the pregnant woman's breasts sometimes become
painfully sensitive. And some men (and some women, too) need to
adjust to the fact that the woman now looks, feels and behaves
But all those things can be handled, particularly if they take place
in an atmosphere of love!
Some of the most important facts to remember include that sex during
pregnancy doesn't harm the baby and that in all likelihood whatever
you enjoy the baby will enjoy, too. Read more here:Making
Love During Pregnancy
G Spot Lovemaking Techniques
The famous G spot: Not a myth, but a very solid and very wet
reality! Particularly for women, although men, too, have a
delightful G spot. So called G spot orgasms really are something
else! You do not, however, need to focus as much on a particular
spot inside the body as you need to have a particular mind set.
Although ... a bit of knowledge definitely helps, too. :-) Read more
about G Spot Lovemaking Techniques [LINK].
Well, here's one for the slightly more advanced folks! Making love
under water is certainly possible and can in fact be very enjoyable.
Pros include the fact that you and your partner are almost
weightless and cons include the physical difficulties arising from
the fact that you do need to breathe and for penetration you do need
lubrication - which the water tends to wash away. Read more about it
on Underwater Lovemaking [LINK].
Masculine and Feminine Gender, Side and Energy
Traditionally 'yin' and 'yang' have been used to describe the
polarity between the feminine side (yin) and the masculine side
(yang) of many things, including us humans with our genders and
different kinds of energy.
The gender of a person is merely an indication: Women with a
powerfully masculine energy and men with a powerful feminine energy
both exist. We all - every single male and every single female -
contain both sides, both energies.
When it comes to making love those sides, or energies, are quite
important. This is true for both heterosexual and homosexual people.
Understanding, accepting and using the different energies is one of
the things that moves your lovemaking to the next level. Go to the
page Masculine and Feminine Gender, Side and Energy [LINK] if you
want to learn more about this subject.
Making Love to My Wife
Here's a case story I would like to share: Gary tells us how his
love life has changed over the years. It actually includes some of
the things you can read about on this page - from Gary and Anna's
first time love making to underwater lovemaking to sex during Anna's
first pregnancy - and the difficult time of no sex that followed
Anna's birth of their first child. The thing that Gary focuses on,
however, is their love. Read Gary and Anna's story here: Making Love
to My Wife [LINK].
Making Love to a Man
And another case story for you:
Marie shares some of her lovemaking experiences in an honest and
very down to earth sort of way.
For Marie lovemaking started out as raw sex, pure and simple, and
then gradually over the years evolved into something that's so
incredible as to perhaps appear incomprehensible to most folks.
Read Marie's story on the page Making Love to a Man [LINK].
Wedding Night Lovemaking
Yet another case story for you: John and Joanne had known each other
for several years when they decided to get married. They also
decided to make their wedding night something special. And they
succeeded! Read how here: Wedding Night Lovemaking [LINK].
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